|
Life’s Perfect Fire...
“If you plant flowers in your garden, you experience the bloom of spring’s perfection. If you plant love and service in the heart of a child, you experience the power of life’s perfect fire.”
©2007 - Dr. Gail Hayes
“Mommy, can I bring an extra snack today?” At the time my second grade daughter asked the question, the answer seemed simple. No problem, right? But I was not prepared for the lesson that followed.
“Sure sweetie. We can send an extra snack. Who’s it for? It’s nice of you to share with a friend.”
“Well, it’s not for a friend. It’s for a boy in my class who keeps asking me for my snack everyday. He’s hungry all the time and always asks everybody for their snacks,” she said not looking up from her breakfast.
I was intrigued. I smiled but knew that she was serious so I told her that it was kind of her to bring her classmate a snack.
Everyday for the next few weeks she carried an extra snack to school. One day, out of curiosity, I asked how her classmate was doing and if he was enjoying his snacks.
“Oh, I still give him the snack everyday, but Mommy, he complains because he says that he doesn’t like what I brought or he says that I don’t bring him enough.”
I took a deep breath and prepared myself to respond. I wanted to tell her that I would no longer be sending the extra snack and for her to stop giving her ungrateful classmate anything until he learned some manners. But her next sentence jolted me back to the parenting zone with such force that I couldn’t do anything but stand in awe.
“But you know what Mommy? I always remember what you told me when he acts that way. You told me that if someone doesn’t act nice on the outside then they are hurting on the inside. So, I guess he must really need the snack even when he complains. Anyway, he always asks me for it. He eats it anyway and I think it makes him feel better because I bring it. So I will keep bringing it.”
As she released these words from her seven year old mouth, they fell upon her mother like a ton of virtual bricks. Each syllable cut away any irritation I had regarding the situation. Each vowel, consonant, period, and comma reminded me of sentences spoken when teaching childhood lessons. I turned my face away from her view as my eyes fought to hold back tears. I was embarrassed at my pride but proud of my daughter.
Yes, I had told her about kindness and sharing, but for that moment in time, I failed the test and was about to commit parenting suicide and tell her to be unkind to a child who needed the gift of kindness.
That day, my daughter reminded me of a valuable lesson. I have to live what I teach. If I teach my children to be kind even when others don’t return the kindness then it builds character. If I teach them to only be kind to those who are kind to them, then they have learned nothing.
I hope as we focus on this month’s value of Kindness (Caring and Sharing), as parents, we can continue to plant seeds that will give us and our children the marvelous gift of a garden filled with life’s perfect fire.
**********************************************************
Dr. Gail Hayes is an international speaker and author. She is also a character value consultant and the creator of the Don’t Give Your Power Away Program.
To contact Dr. Gail or to carry this column in your ezine, |
|
Character Article of the Month |
